The week prior to my first chemo, I was scared out of my freaking mind. Moments before my sweetie and I left for my appointment, I broke down crying and asked him if I really had to go. I knew the gist of what was going to happen but I didn't really know what was going to happen, if that makes any sense.
Now with chemo number 2 (but really number 1 - blargh!) coming in two days, the anxiety of the unknown is gone. Plus, one of the worst case scenarios already happened. Now the nurses know I'm a "special" case and will be watching me even closer to make sure I have another allergic reaction or, well, die. I guess if one is going to have a severe allergic reaction, then the best place to have that happen is in a hospital with a nurse standing six inches away. Haha. My To-Do List for Thursday: go to AGH, talk with my nurse, head to the treatment room and sit there for hours while poison enters my body, come home and sleep for two days.
If the weather isn't being a bitch, my friend Amber is goinng to come with me to this chemo, which is going to help beat my anxiety into submission. Everybody should have an "Amber" in their lives - I truly believe that. Friends are the famliy you choose. :) I have a friend who hates my breast cancer just as much as me and wants to help me however she can and has never made me feel like I'm inconveniencing her. I will gladly accept help from those who offer, not those who make me feel like I have to bum rides or take public transit to the hospital.
Also - I STILL HAVE MY HAIR. Take that and shove it down your pie hole, cancer.