Sunday, June 10, 2012

Doctors, doctors and more doctors

I have three doctors appointments this week.  On Wednesday, I'll be seeing my breast surgeon and the plastic surgeon.  Plastic surgeon will be taking out my stitches, which will make wearing slightly tight clothing a lot easier.  If my shirt is too tight, then you can the stitches, or as I'd like to call them, the artwork of my plastic surgeon.  I've been hiding my chest in reconstruction with either drapey tunics or a strategically placed scarf.

Caution: Boob work in progress.

I'm nervous about this upcoming appointment with Plastic Surgeon.  My right side, formerly the home of the murderous Sideshow Boob, has been hurting a lot more than the left side.  My back, toward the bottom of my right shoulder blade, just feels tender.  I'm nervous that nefarious plans (like an infection or who knows) are happening inside my body, and I have no say in them.  I have been telling myself that so far, everything is okay since I don't have a fever.  Maybe since my right side had the previous surgery, chemo and radiation, then it's just common sense that the side would be super tender.  Who knows... oh wait, the Plastic Surgeon will.

I really really really want to walk through this reconstruction with flying nipples, er, color.  I haven't had the best of luck when it came to this whole cancer thing, and I want something, anything, to go smoothly.  Please, purdy please.  

I also find out when Plastic Surgeon thinks I can go back to work and when the tissue expanders leave and the fake boobs come in.  This will be quite a week.

On Thursday, I'll be seeing Unibrow to discuss my life post double mastectomy.  I will not be happy if he suggests me going on Tamoxifen again.  I hated taking that drug every single time it went down my gullet.  It screwed with my mind and my body.  I don't want to spend the next four or five years of my life feeling like a menopausal bitch.  I'm in my early 30s and that drug makes me feel like I'm in my 50s or 60s.  I should be enjoying life and sex, not complaining about hot flashes and worrying about blood clots and uterine cancer.

Three appointments plus a blood draw means a busy week for me.


  1. I am betting that SideShow Ghost Boob hurts more just because of all the treatment. Mabel (my cancery noboob) gives me HELL. Hazel (non-cancery, preventative noboob) healed like a champ and doesn't hurt at all. With all the chemo we did (and the rads you did) I think it makes sense to have some recovery issues with this surgery. But because you are a badass, you will be FINE. <3

    1. That's what I keep telling myself whenever some new, weird feeling pops up. Like right now, I can really feel the tissue expander on the right but not left. I just remind myself that the right is the bastard side and has been through so much more than the left.

      I love that you named them Hazel and Mabel. Love.